Bounce House

Today I went with both boys to the local indoor bounce house to meet up with my friend and her two sons.  It was a much anticipated event, and we used it to bribe J into not punching anyone for a couple of days.  We headed over, and it wasn't too crowded.  My friend and I got the kids signed in, and then we... GASP... went to sit on the couch.

I don't usually go sit on the couch.  I usually follow my kids around and watch them play and make sure no one is getting hit or kicked or pushed or punched.  But today, I didn't.

I was tired.  I wanted to talk to my friend, who has been a bit down.  We have tried for a week or so to get together, but life kept getting in the way.  So today we needed to talk.  Plus, the last several visits to the bounce house have been so uneventful.  I threw caution to the wind.

The first hour or so was fine.  J had to use the bathroom several times, and when I returned from one of the trips, G was in my friend's lap crying.  As it turns out, he'd been bitten.

I know how other people react during situations like this, because I've been approached several times after G has hurt other children.  A lot of parents get enraged at the thought of their precious little so-and-so being bullied or injured.  Some shrug it off- "Boys will be boys."  My reaction?  "What did you do to him first?"

So...  G wanted the kid to move out of his way.  Seeing as the kid couldn't read G's mind, G decided to push him.  The kid didn't like it.  He bit G.  Bit him.  Left a tooth mark and everything.

We go and find the kid, a three year old who is quite reluctant to come out of the bouncy thing he's playing on.  There's no parent around for him, but as a teacher, I don't let that stop me.  I yank that kid out, throw a string of obscenities at him, and tell him to leave.

Just kidding.  I explain that he and G have something to take care of, and the boy finally comes out of the bouncy thing.  G apologizes.  The little boy apologizes.  I show the kid G's arm, and tell him that he's hurt G and left a mark- biting's a big deal.  At this point the mom comes up.  She asks, "What's going on?"

I said, "The boys had a bit of a tussle.  G did push your son first, and then your son bit him.  We were just exchanging apologies."  I kind of expected some amount of concern from this other mother.  I mean, her kid bit him.  G shouldn't have pushed, but he didn't leave a mark on the other kid.  Her response?

"He's three.  He's going to be a bit defensive."  And she takes her kid and walks off in a huff.

We all need to learn from stuff like this.  First of all, watch your kid at the bounce house (that's for me, not this other mom).  Second, our kids may occasionally be aggressive towards each other.  While we might not like it, its a learning experience for all of us.  If our kids are defensive, we don't need to be.  She left shortly afterward.

Maybe her kid bites all the time and she was really upset that they couldn't enjoy the bounce house.  If she'd talked to me a bit, she would've found a kindred spirit. I still judge playdate success by whether or not someone gets purposely injured by G.  She could've come sit with us and laughed and talked about wild children and made a friend.

Maybe her son is an only child and needs to learn to deal with other kids.  Again, she could've joined us and we could've helped her out.

So, but wide world out there, what would you have done?  Should I have waited until a parent was around to get the apologies going?  Should I have just had the boys stay away from each other?  Am I  crazy to even be rehashing this interaction hours after its passed?